Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Happy Birthday Matt

So today, being my son’s 9th Birthday brings a lot of emotions to the table. I have been all over the country and seen all kinds of things and been a part of a lot of people’s lives. But the biggest regret I have is that I am not part of my sons life the way i should be. I will never say that I am the person that needs to be there to raise him and teach him the ways of life, but I wish that I had decided to man up and be there like I should have. He is an awesome little man that deserves more than what I could have given him in life. I miss him more and more every day that goes by. I spend my nights praying and crying that he is ok and he is healthy and happy. I know that the time in my life that he as born i was not in a place to be able to be a responsible enough to be the Dad and the Father that I needed to be to raise him correctly, so his Mother, Kathy, has been left with the job of raising him, and all I can say is that she ahs done an impeccable job. He is the spitting image of her and I. He has the attitude of me and the personality of her, which is a great combination. I just hope that he understands one day why I couldnt do what i needed to do for him. He is the reason that I decide to continue on hoping that one day him and I will get the chance to meet and spend some time as father and son, but if not, I hope that he knows I love him and he carries me with him in every breathe he takes.

 

Happy 9th birthday Matthew James Jordan